the [Queen] of wishful thinking.

No really. I’m fucking pissed. (And all the cleverer names I tried coming up with for this were way too wordy.) 

September 9th. My first real football game as a Sun Devil. Because let’s be honest… Davis didn’t count. I had low expectations. I’d heard Missouri was quite good, and I honestly did not expect to win. It was a nailbiter and we won in overtime in the rain. We beat a ranked team. I couldn’t be happier to be a Sun Devil. Pretty fucking exciting shit.

Football season continues and we’re doing pretty well. We lost to Illinois when everyone said we shouldn’t have. Then in October, we beat USC. Unexpected but hoped for and so so important to the girl who gave up on her dream of being a Trojan within the last couple years. It was beyond the pride I’ve ever felt for anything in my life. I was following our rankings in the polls and it only added to my excitement.

I went to Oregon and paraded around with my classmates in our maroon and gold, toting around an “Overrated” sign featuring the Oregon “O”, along with another sign depicting Puddles the duck getting stomped to death by Sparky. We tailgated and got shitfaced and hung out on party buses with ASU alumni. I was so proud of the way we played that first half; it was close. Ultimately, we couldn’t keep it up in the second half. We lost and that was a cold and depressing ride bus ride back from Eugene, but it was okay. We’d had high hopes, but realistically losing to the Ducks was to be expected and not detrimental. 

We took two weeks off. It was homecoming and I got the oh-so-exciting experience of hanging out on the field before the game while the team warmed up followed by a front row spot in the reserved part of the student section. We played Colorado, a team who had not won a single game, and we killed them. We still had it. We were a shoe-in for Pac-12 South Champions and we were favored in our last four games.

And then it all changed. November 5th. To most college football fans, this was a big day because of the LSU-Alabama matchup. (How exciting that was.) UCLA was not very good, losing every other game… but they were the next highest team in our division and it was our most important game post-Oregon. It came down to them scoring right before the end of the game… they were just one point ahead. We had an opportunity for a field goal… three points that would give us the W. Our kicker, Alex Garoutte missed. We lost to the deeply average UCLA Bruins. It was the beginning of the end. 

The following weekend was suddenly extremely important. Everything was going according to plan. UCLA got beat by Utah which was exactly what we needed to stay in the lead of the South. Meanwhile, our hated rivals, the Arizona Wildcats, lost to a crappy Colorado team to add to the hilarity. At Buffalo Wild Wings, everything started to go wrong. Seemingly perfect Stanford ran out of Luck… losing to Oregon and causing my mood to plummet. And then the Cougars started to catch up to us. We had opportunities which we blew until eventually we lost to a WSU team who we should have easily beat. Any given day.

I was angry but I was hungry for our big rivalry game the following weekend. U of A blew. If Colorado was the worst team in the North, they were surely the worst in the South. But as they say, anything can happen in a rivalry game. And it did because we lost. Again. I drowned my sorrows on Mill Avenue because I was really a Sun Devil now and that’s what we do. (Although let me differentiate between myself and some of these other kids I go to school with. I care very much about the games and I go and watch and I don’t leave early to party. Which is not something I can say about the Sun Devil Nation as a whole.)

Black Friday indeed. There was a situation figured out. Utah needed to beat Colorado… as anyone would have expected them to. If they won and UCLA lost to USC, as anyone would also expect, one of two things could happen. If we won our game, there would be a three-way tie and we would win the tie breaker and go to the Pac-12 Championship against Oregon. If we lost, (and I honestly didn’t have much faith in us by then,) then at least Utah would go on, instead of fUCLA. I watched that afternoon game with bated breath… only to see Colorado win their second game of the season in a disgusting and unwelcome upset. They had screwed us. No matter what we did or how shitty UCLA did the following day (which they did), they were going to the Championship game. It was with a heavy heart that I settled in with some friends from home and 12 pack to watch the game at my parents’ house. Again, we lost. And I regretted watching it with my friends over my parents because they had no real loyalty to ASU over Cal and their commentary was obnoxious as fuck. 

The following Monday, the firings came. Erickson was out. Here was an opportunity to turn our program around. A week passed and other schools got coaches, but not us. Sunday came and went while we talked about hiring June Jones but didn’t, and we landed the Vegas Bowl against fucking #7 Boise State… much to their dismay. Later in the week, Jones came up again, and people flipped out. An offer was made and withdrawn, and we were painted as the bad guys. I was tempted to make fun of fUCLA and their coach-less situation, but we were no better… and then UCLA got a coach. Things were getting more humiliating every day. Today we hit rock bottom as UCLA hired our wide receivers coach and #1 recruiter Steve Broussard, costing us what will likely be much of Erickson’s promising recruiting class.

Things had gone from bad to worse in November, but with the season done and only a bowl game which we are expected to lose, nobody expected December to be worse. Thanks to the fine work of President Michael Crow, AD Lisa Love, and COO Steve Patterson on our coaching search, that is exactly what has happened. While I love ASU and will be a proud Sun Devil for life, I’m fully aware of the way some of the other schools look at us. I know of our party school/high admissions rate reputation. I saw the signs saying things like, “If you can read this sign, you don’t go to ASU” when I was in Eugene. I had a gaggle of bitches from U of A scream at me and call me a whore with STDs, as they passed by me in Palos Verdes. But I’m a proud Sun Devil and I can easily get past those things and brush them off. After all, they’re mindless stereotypes, they’re not true, and the people who say them are pathetic. However, I cannot forgive this new low we’ve reached in the public eye. It is an embarrassment and it’s looking to be detrimental to our football program.

I’m hungry. And I want blood. Here’s what needs to happen: All three leaders of this coaching search, the Triumvirate of Suck that is Love, Crow, and Patterson, need to be fired. This bullshit is not okay and I want their heads on the motherfucking chopping block for it. Second, we need a good coach and sooner better than later, so we can assemble a solid staff before it’s too late. We’ve already missed out on Broussard, due to the fuck ups of the powers that be. We need to keep offensive coordinator Noel Mazzone on, and if that means making him Head Coach, I think a lot of people will be okay with that, including the boys on the team WHO WANT HIM AS HEAD COACH. Lastly, I want to see us play Boise State so tough. All our losses this season (with the exception of Oregon, although let’s be honest… we didn’t look good second half so you can kind of include that, I suppose) were teams we were better than, TEAMS WE SHOULD HAVE BEAT. The teams we rocked against were the better ones. We have a shot. I want to win, but I at least want to put up the best fight possible. Let’s do this for the seniors, let’s do this for Erickson, LET’S DO THIS FOR US. Let’s shock the world and show them we’re not a joke after all and we’ll be back next year.

Coming soon: Another ASU rant… this one inspired by the complete bullshit lack of students that show up to basketball games. (If you bought student season tickets for football, you have season tickets for basketball too. Duh.)

so I’ve made one genuinely awesome friend here so far. and weirdly, shockingly, WTF-ishly I met her at a club for Christians. I know, right? it’s like “whaaaaat? you’re in a Christian club?” I joined because they seemed nice and really I just joined more for the social reasons, but I’ve definitely read the Bible a bit as a result. 

see, I have this one friend. and then I have a lot of friend substitutes and they’re people I’m in clubs with. I guess some of them have kind of become friends, but other than going to football games with this guy from one of the clubs, I haven’t really done much with any of these people other than club sanctioned events.

but you see, I’ve joined PBL, the ASU chapter of the same business club I was in back home. and we’ve had a couple meetings, some socials, I watched The Hangover 2 with them, and I’m co-directing the sponsorships for a big event we put on for the high schoolers in January. and I’ve joined Camp Sparky, where we’ve put on camps for 5th graders and gone out to dinner and hung out downtown and gone to the trampoline park. I’ve joined the Sports Business Association (SBA). I got to go listen to Rod Graves, the Arizona Cardinals’ GM, speak at a meeting, and just last weekend I got to with them to see the Giants and Diamondbacks play… AFTER getting a big tour of Chase Field, enjoying batting practice, dinner at Alice Cooperstown, and a little sitdown with an exec for the Diamondbacks. what else? Dumbledore’s Army… there’s been a couple DA meetings, a sorting ceremony, hanging out getting dinner afterwards. And of course the Christian club… hiking “A” mountain and lots of other fun, chill hangouts there.

so the thing is I always have something to do. I mean, I do have a few nights a week where I get home from class and can truly relax with no meetings or plans or commitments. (well, I should be doing homework.) but the point is, I always have tons of options. between all the clubs I’m in and things through the School of Community Resources and Development, there is always, ALWAYS something. look at last Friday. I was invited to an event the Christians were having and there was a DA meeting and event I would have liked to attend as well, but I was doing the Dbacks thing with the SBA and loving it so I didn’t go to either of those. on wednesday, I have class in the morning and then I’m actually skipping my bible study sess to stay in Phoenix and get lunch with my dad while he’s in town. I’m sticking around after for a Event Planning, Sports, Tourism Career Panel. (could that be any more perfect? that’s every career I can’t decide between.) then I’m coming back to Tempe where the SBA and PBL both have meetings and socials I have to choose between. oh, how about Saturday? Zoo trip with Camp Sparky, football game against OSU, and girls night with the Christians. can’t do it all. not to mention, I’ve already been told about a variety of other events I’ll be missing to go home, etc. but I guess it’s better to have all these options and too much to do then nothing to do and no one to hang out with.

it’s weird. I’m always with people, but it’s not as satisfying as the friendships I’m used to. there is also some serious partying/boozing lacking. particularly considering I GO TO ASU lol. we’ll see what happens from here. october’s about to be crazy… I’m turning 22, starting a new job, going home to CA for a wedding, possibly going to Oregon, my sister and her friend are visiting (and we’re going to Taylor Swift!), and then it’s Halloween/Homecoming/the camp I’m co-directing at Camp Sparky. oh, and then there’s the world series happening. I am now expecting the Diamondbacks to go all the way and ensure that I get to attend a world champs parade for a second year in a row. like I said, crazy.

so I’ve been dreading the fact that I’ll have to take another science class at some point for ASU. I just found out that they have a 4 unit Biology Behind the Crime Scene class with a lab. I’m in absolute love right now.

1. my major, Tourism Development & Management, is amazing and if I get into the internship program I want my senior year (which typically includes a full-time job after graduation), the worst option I have is probably the Ritz Carlton. and if that’s your worst option, you know you’ve got it made. plus they have the perfect PR minor for me as well, just like USF did.

2. Pac-10 Pac-12 sports. Sun Devils football, basketball, and baseball will make this a true a college experience, like the one I’d envisioned when I wanted to go to USC… without Watts.

3. classes next semester? oh, just Leisure and the Quality of Life, Stress Management Tools, Intro to Travel and Tourism, Introduction to Social Work, Sports Management, and Community Services & Professions. fully expect to enjoy life and have a 4.0 this fall.

4. there is a class called Harry Potter & American Culture, a Dumbledore’s Army club, and a Quidditch League. THERE IS LIFE AFTER THE 8TH MOVIE!!

5. I will no longer be mocked by the rest of my family for being pale before summer starts. 

6. other clubs I’m planning on joining this fall besides the DA? Phi Beta Lambda (that’s the business club I’m currently involved in at las po), Camp Sparky (friday day camps for at-risk 5th graders around Arizona), Habitat for Humanity (at least two saturday builds required per semester), and that’s just to name the ones I’m most excited about.

7. SPRING TRAINING. need I say more???

8. Tempe is pretty fucking awesome.

man, do I love wednesday ladies nights. I am going to miss my friends here so much when I leave for AZ which is why this must be the best summer ever.

but I’m quite excited for Arizona State. my major program is awesome. my fall classes are awesome. Pac-12 sports will be awesome. I already picked out like 25+ clubs I want to join. but I’ve narrowed it down to the important ones… Phi Beta Lambda (that’s the same business club I’m in right now), Dumbledore’s Army, Camp Sparky (where you do day camps for at-risk 5th graders… gotta carry on being a camp counselor duhh), and Habitat for Humanity. alright, I’m so tired typing is painful. goodnight internet worlddd